Just Starting

Okay, so all of my kids have one of these and I can't comment on their blogs without one of my own so.... here goes.
Today is Friday, October 24th and we went to Ashers 1st birthday party. He is such a sweet baby and I can't believe he is already a year old. I still remember his troubled entry into this world and seeing him for the first time with tubes in him. It made me cry, both with joy to see Joshua and Ambers' son and with fear. We weren't sure how long he was going to be in the hospital and I wanted to hold him so much! Now he is strong and healthy and perfect. Amber and Josh have done a wonderful job with him. Heather and Jason were there with Jaron and Tayson. Honestly I don't think the universe is balanced right because all the gorgeous babies are coming to our family! It is so hard not to kiss them 24/7 , I have to resisit the urge though. I don't want them taking one look at me and running in the opposite direction. Here comes kissy face Grandma Terry! It was fun seeing Johnny and Sarah there. Sarah is finally looking pregnant and just as beautiful as ever. I can't wait to meet Tristan and kiss his little face. I was aware, as I always am on these occasions, of those who weren't there. Shayze and Alisha and of course Emma. Rachelle and Jared had previous commitments so they weren't there either. I realize as we continue to grow in numbers and life experiences, it will become even more rare that we are all together at once. I live for those times. It fills my cup as it were.
My job is going well and even though I am tired sometimes I am grateful to be able to contribute in some small way to help daddy. I wish it could be more. I wish I could be there and see momma every day and help daddy in any way I could. I feel out of it sometimes and the ache it creates is palpable. I know I will not see momma again in this life and it brings me to tears. Sometimes, when I am alone I will hear her voice in my head as clear as a bell telling me how much she loves me, pointing out all my attributes, even some that only a mother could see. I always knew that she and daddy loved me unconditionally. What a blessing that is! My sisters are helping out a lot and I am especially grateful for Holly and Jean, and truthfully somewhat envious too.
My family here is wonderful and I am so grateful to them for their support. I was so excited to hear about Steve and Kellies' healthy baby boy! It brought me to tears (jeez I cry a lot) and I can't wait to meet him. I am so grateful to Denise and Mark for opening their home to Cherisa and for understanding when she had to go back to school. I am looking forward to our 'date night' to catch up on everyone.
And finally I would like to tell John how much I love him. How blessed I am to have the best husband ever who spoils me and takes such good care of our family, spiritually and temporally. I love you honey, you are why my heart beats.